Posted September 1st, 2010 by CG
Joan Rivers makes me ‘wanna’ puke. What a f**king nauseating celebrity she turned out to be after Johnny Carson gave her a shot at the ‘big time’.
The foul-mouthed old bag who thinks her shit doesn’t stink, has told producers of Dancing With The Stars (DWTS) to go ‘f**k themselves’, after they ignored her request to be a contestant on the show.
Apparently she needs the exercise.
The woman is a f**king dinosaur and she is ain’t no Betty White.
The former gold-digger certainly hasn’t aged gracefully. That’s for f**king sure. That said–with any luck at all, the next time Joan Rivers goes under the knife for another face altering procedure, the surgeon might accidentally cut her tongue out and you know, do Hollywood a favour.
She has got to be the most annoying, foul-mouthed, fossilized c**t travelling in celebrity circles in Hollywood as far as Confessions is concerned.
Wondering how the foul-mouthed comedienne feels about Bristol Palin appearing on DWTS.
DWTS goes to air on September 20th.
Jailbird Paris Hilton is making blonde girls around the world look a lot smarter than joke tellers give them credit for.
She seriously doesn’t believe that anybody is going to believe her story that, the cocaine she was busted for having in her possession in Sin City last Friday night wasn’t hers because she was carrying it in a purse she says she borrowed from a friend.
HEY PARIS, listen up you silly bitch, umm there’s a problem with the story you’re telling. If you borrowed the purse from a friend as you claim, would that purse not have been empty when you put your belongings in it?
Also, the cocaine that fell out of the purse when you reached into it for your lipstick…
Like seriously ya dumb bitch, you would have seen it when you put your belongings in that borrowed purse, unless of course hit was hidden behind the lining of that ‘borrowed purse’ or in stashed in a secret compartment, either of those scenarios leading Confessions to believe that when you reached into ‘that borrowed purse’ for your lipstick, it wouldn’t have fallen to the ground in front of the cop that busted you. It would have been securely placed and out of sight.
What Paris should have said was, “That’s not mine. Somebody must have put it there. Somebody is trying to set me up because of who I am.” That sounds more believable don’t you think?
Hey, what do you reckon that a sales clerk in one of those posh stores Paris shops at comes forward and says, “I remember selling that purse to Paris. She’s lying about having borrowed it from a friend.’
She might not to go jail for this, but at the end of the day Confessions believes she’s a ‘heat score’ that nobody is going to want to touch when it comes picking and choosing socialites parading around as celebrities to sprain there fashions, services and products, not to mention film and television roles.
Not that she has been their go-to ‘It’ girl to begin with.
The purse the cocaine fell out of wasn’t hers my ass. She was busted at 1130PM during a night of partying. She either knew the coke was there because it was hers or belonged to her boyfriend, or, maybe she was delivering it to a friend–you know–she’s a drug mule maybe.
Read something somewhere about her concealing cocaine in her vagina while travelling.
Of course, the possibility still remains that somebody planted the drugs on her; after all she has made a lot of enemies.
Having said that, was Lady Gaga in Las Vegas last Friday night?
Always laughing my f**king ass off at Fantasia, Levi Johnson, Johnston or whatever the f**k his last name is and lady thumper Mel ‘What Women Don’t Want’ Gibson
So is anybody feeling sorry for that “home wrecker” Fantasia yet?
What about the folks at VH1–ya reckon they might be thinking they might have made a mistake producing a reality TV show about an American Idol winner, who couldn’t turn her win on Fox into anything more than a tell-all book that flopped and a failed suicide attempt? Spreading her legs, letting men into her love tunnel–apparently she’s been pretty f**kin’ good at that though.
What a ‘hoe’ she is huh, Kanye, huh Usher? Betcha Fantasia kinda got around in the music industry, gave those in a position to help her music career flourish, quite a ride.
Fantasia, like what a f**king loser she turned out to be when she was supposed to be a winner.
Messing around with married men, f**king her family around, and the icing on the cake–her failed attempt at overdosing on aspirin and maybe a sleep aid.
Can you believe that, she tried to kill herself with aspirin? Like that is way too f**king funny.
Naah, she couldn’t even get killing herself right and now VH1 is seriously thinking about pulling the plug on her reality TV show.
They are reworking her show as you read this, and well, reworking a TV show shortly before it is due to go to air, pretty much means the graduate from the ‘Leeann Rimes and Angelina Jolie Academy of Husband Stealing‘ shouldn’t expect Fantasia for Real to become a money-making machine for her.
That show definitely won’t generate enough money for the North Carolina hose bag to compensate Paula Cook, should of course the scorned wife win the ‘alienation of affection lawsuit‘ she has brought against Fantasia and Antwuan Cook.
Fantasia is facing a ‘home wrecker’ lawsuit and if she loses, well all that money she made from her sex video, most of it anyway and if there is any left, will be eaten up in legal fees and compensatory damages to the woman whose husband she stole.
Something bizarre– Levi Johnston (is it Johnson maybe–Who the f**k knows or cares, right.) hooking up with Fantasia and making a baby. F**k man, feel sorry for that child if that happens.
Hey, Levi could use the kind of PR a story about him knocking up a dysfunctional R&B singer would bring, right. Fantasia and Levi, yep, I reckon they would make for a great over-the-top dysfunctional couple, kinda like Spencer and Frankenheidi–Hey remember those two f**ktards?
Apparently the ‘Wasilla Whack Job‘, you know, ‘he who thinks he’s a big star now”, was turned away from the exclusive Blackberry Torch launch party in Los Angeles this past Wednesday. F**k, to be a fly on the wall when that went down. Yeah, that Levi boy, he would have put on quite a display of immaturity–that waah, waah, waah you can’t do this to me, do you know who I am act he would have put on. He’s a f**kin’ loser too. Who’s that guy that had his pecker chopped off by his wife? Levi kind of reminds me of John Wayne Bobbit.
Yep, while Adam Grenier, Lea Michele and Rashida were inside munching on crumb cupcakes, dancin’ to tunes by Drake and getting free Blackberries, Levi was spotted sitting on the kerb outside the club having a big sulk…Overheard by sidewalk pedestrian, “It’s not f**king fair. I bet they would have let me in if I had Fantasia on my arm.”
You know what, the more Confessions thinks about it, the more he is convinced that Fantasia and Levi would make a happy dysfunctional celebrity couple, oh and the gossip the rag mags could milk their relationship for.
Yeah, Levi and Fantasia should they decide to hook up romantically, what a freak show that would turn out to be. Rag mags would be all over that story.
Mel Gibson– like if somebody were to ask you who should be a the top of the F**ktard List in Hollywood and you said his name, WOO-HOO-HOO-F**KING-HOO for you. You win a limited edition “I Dated Mel Gibson‘ first aid kit.
Like how f**king vicious is that drunken c**t, and what do you reckon that dinosaur who raised him, Hutton, taught the man no woman in right mind would want now how to smack his bitches out?
I’d like to lock the ‘lady thumper’ in a room with a couple of bitches in my family (on my mother’s side), but not because I want to see the two most hated women in my life kick the shit out of him.
Nope, I want to see Mel kick the f**king shit out of those two and not just knock out a few teeth either. Yeah, there is no f**king love lost between me, my mother and sister.
Hey, you think Mel might have slapped his ex-wife Robyn around a few dozen times during their marriage. You know don’t you, that men who smack the shit out of their women just don’t all of a sudden become a woman beater, right?
Mel has a history of punching the shit out of women. He has to. There’s no way he became a ‘lady thumper’ over night; just like f**kin’ that.
Make no mistake about it, there’s a history of physical abusive towards women in Mel‘s story.
I’d be willing to bet what little I have that, there are a few women in Mel’s past that he might have grabbed around the throat, slammed up against a wall, punched out, and maybe even kicked them where the sun doesn’t shine.
Confessions doesn’t believe for one second that Mel didn’t from time-to-time especially when he was drunk, knock around his ex-wife. And, there is no f**king way that Oksana Grigorieva is the only lover he has smacked out during one of his drunken rages.
Heidi Montag, the woman who is on a quest to become the Americanized version of the UK’s “Jordan” aka “Katie Price“, has filed for divorce from that creepy looking f**k and co-star of The Hills, Spencer Pratt.
Woohoo, like who the f**k cares about those two dysfunctional whack jobs, right.
