Posted August 1st, 2010 by CG
Like how f**king dumb and naive is Matrix star’s 19-year-old daughter
You know, until I read the story about Laurence Fishburne’s daughter Montana becoming a porn actress, I had no idea she even existed.
Having said that, the budding pornstar says that if it wasn’t for the success of TV celebrity Kim Kardashian’s sex tape,she probably wouldn’t have given the idea of being a pornstar a second thought, or words that implied as much anyway.
What she actually said was, “I’ve watched how successful Kim Kardashian became and I think a lot of it was due to the release of her sex tape.”
LMFAO-So what she is saying is that if Kardashian didn’t suck a little dick and spread her legs for a sex video, Kardashian wouldn’t be “the celebrity” she has become?
That’s f**king funny.
F**k and suck your way to the top of the celebrity shit pile Montana, just like Kim Kardashian did. Make your daddy proud while he is still alive.
Lindsane one should be able to pull this role off
So Confessions wants to know, “WTF is this bullshit I’m hearing that Lindsay Lohan is going to play Deep Throat actress Linda Lovelace” in a movie about the tragic porn icon who became a feminist and later an anti-porn activist?” Whose f***ing bright idea was that, and does anybody think Lilo will have to you know, prepare for the role.
I’m sure the number of times Lindsay has spread her legs for men and went down on men and women is more than enough experience for her to be able to skirt the usual preparations a thespian makes when preparing to take on a big role in a major motion picture, right?
Nobody but Lindsay knows that she got the part of Linda Boreman who rose to fame in the 1972 porn flick Deep Throat, not even the directors of Lovelace, Jeffrey Friedman and Rob Epstein.
Lindsay Lohan doesn’t have much going for her these days, and her self-esteem has definitely got to be in the tank, so maybe we should you know, give her a pass when it comes to this particular lie she is telling everybody to help her build up her sagging self-esteem. Nothing long with letting her live her fairy tale if that’s what makes her feel good about herself, right?
“I paid thousands to f*** a Playboy model but got caught”- said by a drunken Eliot Spitzer during a night out with the boys perhaps?
If you need any proof that anybody can f*** a Playboy model, have a look at the photos of former call girl for A-Johns Ashley Dupre, in Playboy and think Eliot Spitzer. Don’t think about him until after you finish spanking your monkey or padding your pink canoe though. Why spoil the moment.
What do you want to bet the disgraced and humiliated former New York governor is gloating a little when he’s hanging with the boys at the club now? What, you don’t think Spitzer isn’t the kind of guy to boast about bouncing a Playboy model on his lap and thrusting his dick into her front and backside. Like get f***ing real if you think that, and yeah I know she wasn’t then, but she is now–and yes she does, for a price she will let you do it to her “doggy style”.
Get up close and personal with the Girls Next Door
Yeah, so anyway, the May 2010 issue of Playboy just might turn out to be the biggest selling issue of the skin magazine ever. Too bad about her hair catching fire though. With the amount of gunk she puts in her hair though, I’m not that surprised that her head kind of went up in flames. Long hair, candles–hmm, ya think the might be an accident looking for a time to happen?
You know what the best part of all this is though, Eliot Spitzer paid big bucks to see her naked among other things, and the rest of us if we are so inclined, can pay less than whatever a Playboy magazine is worth nowadays–minus the sex acts of course.
Nice to see that Ashley has finally seen the light and is now cashing in on her notoriety, though I would have preferred seeing her naked in Penthouse or Hustler, or the money shots inside the cover is well worth the cover price if you know what I mean.
Pose for Playboy–Click here to find out how
Loredana Jolie, the hottest of all of Tiger Wood’s mistresses if you ask me…
He’s in rehab not allowed to spank his monkey, choke his chicken or whatever you want to call “whackin’ off”, trying to save his marriage.
While sex addict Tiger Woods is doing that though, there’s a Playboy model who with a famous last name like Jolie, is milking her sexual liaisons with the world’s best golfer for all its worth, and trust me, this lady is definitely making a lot of shit up and telling it to anybody at the New York Post willing to part with a few thousands dollars for her tell her fairytale.
This Loredana Jolie slut, what do you want to bet that she is lying through her teeth when it comes to what she and Tiger got up to from sunset until sunrise. One of Tiger’s favorite stabs, liked watching guy on guy action while there was girl on girl action going on in the same room, like how gullible does she think people are?
The only guy on guy action Tiger would be into, being the narcissist he has been made out to be by a few of his other f***s since his “real story” broke, is the guy on guy stuff he stars in. There’s no way he would get off on watching two guys go at it, not unless he was watching a sex video of himself doing another guy. Do you understand what Confessions is saying to you?
No, this Jolie bitch is making shit up as she and Tiger Woods’ story goes along, and she is doing it for some big bucks, and of course the attention she is going to get by telling a few lies about a guy who is so far up himself, it is going to take more than what goes on behind closed doors at a sex addiction clinic to bring him back down to earth.
There is a good side to the “naked poser” though, that of which can be seen from the photograph below and at Playboy if you so dare to check it out.
Canadian Hookers Hoping To Cash In During Vancouver Winter Olympics
Thousand of hookers from across Canada are beginning to arrive in Vancouver in anticipation of cashing in big time during the 2010 Winter Olympic Games, which open on February 12, and not everybody is happy about it. Oh well, it sucks to be them huh, or should I be saying that, they might not be sucking for gold during these Winter Games?
From bored husbands to top city officials, Canadian prostitutes will be spreading their legs for them more combined hours than the total number of hours the Olympic events will actually played out. That amounts to a whole lot of money for the better looking hookers who will be plying their trade on almost every street corner in downtown Vancouver, Whistler
Some of the local hookers are not too happy about their turf being invaded by out-of-town hookers, and Susan Davis of the West Coast Co-operative of Sex Industry Professionals is one such hooker.
The fat and slutty Davis says her organized group of hookers will not be rolling out the welcome mat for the out-of-towners. According to her, prostitutes who are arriving in advance of the Winter Games are taking away business from the local hookers, and it is putting those hookers in a bit of a financial crisis.
Here’s a a f***ing thought ladies, how about be a little more creative when it comes to marketing what your momma gave you to offer, and f*** sakes, clean yourself up a little.
CG has heard that Vancouver hookers are among the filthiest in North America, never mind Canada and that when it comes to transmitting STDs…Well, let’s just not go there, because the last thing Confessions wants is for a hooker to blame him for being part of the problem local hookers are having when it comes to not be able to cash in as much as they think they will be able to during the Winter Games.
FYI-Ms. Davis says that she recently went two days without a getting a single call for her services from her clients, something she says has never happened in her prostitution career before.
Here’s some free advice for you ya fat cow, LOSE SOME F***ING WEIGHT. MAKE YOURSELF LOOK A LITTLE MORE PRESENTABLE
, UNLESS OF COURSE, YOU ARE CHARGING BY THE POUND (is there a pun in there I wonder) FOR YOUR SERVICES. YOU AIN’T GONNA MAKE A LOT OF MONEY BY SPREADING YOUR TREE-SIZE LEGS FOR ANYBODY BABY.
That said, Confessions isn’t holding out much hope for Ms. Davis of cashing in big time during these Winter Games, and by looking at her (see photo above) now much be a good time for to make a career change, because if she can’t cash in spreading her legs now, it isn’t likely she will be able to cash in much after the games are over.
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